Alice in AAPLAND

Picture of Markandey Katju

Markandey Katju

On getting up Alice saw written on a huge poster the words ”Welcome to AAPLAND”.

Once upon a time a little girl called Alice was dozing one summer afternoon on a meadow when she saw a strange sight. A white rabbit wearing a blue coat was running on its hind legs, looking at his watch and saying “I am late”.

Alice got up and ran after him, but the rabbit jumped into a hole in the ground. Alice followed the rabbit into the hole, and she fell and fell, until she landed with a loud thump on some soft ground below.

aliceOn getting up Alice saw written on a huge poster the words ”Welcome to AAPLAND”. This evidently was the name of the country where she had landed.

She then saw a strange sight: a large number of people were marching on a street shouting ‘Free our Prime Minister. Down with dictatorship”.

She asked the group why they were demonstrating? They replied ”Our country’s great Prime Minister has been illegally arrested and jailed by the Enforcement Directorate, and must be immediately released ”.

”But on what charge has he been arrested?” enquire Alice.

”On the false and trumped up charge of master minding a huge liquor scam in Aapland’ was the reply ”although he has never touched a drop of liquor in his life. Can a man who does not drink alcohol be involved in a liquor scam?”

Alice thought of responding that Hitler was a vegetarian and teetotaller, yet he ate up 6 million Jews. But seeing their menacing looks she thought discretion the better part of valour.

At that time another group of people came marching from the opposite direction, holding posters on which was written ”Hang the country’s Natwarlal’.

Alice went towards them and asked why they were demanding hanging of the country’s Prime Minister?

They replied ”This Prime Minister formed a party called ‘Doodh Ka Dhula Party’ and people of the Aapland, who were disgusted at the massive corruption prevailing in the country, voted for him in the last elections as he promised to wipe out corruption from the country, and live a frugal and austere life himself in a small house of 3 rooms.

Instead, there were scams after scams during his rule, the latest being the massive liquor scam, and he has been living lavishly at the taxpayer’s expense”.

Walking ahead Alice saw a palatial mansion, at the entrance of which was written ”Sheesh Mahal ‘. She was told this was the residence of the Prime Minister, built at a cost of Rs 100 crores.

She was told that an amount of Rs 11.30 crore was spent on interior decoration; Rs 6.02 crore on stone and marble flooring; Rs 1 crore on interior consultancy; Rs 2.58 crore on electrical fittings and appliances; Rs 2.85 crore on a fire-fighting system; Rs 1.41 crore on wardrobe and accessories fittings; and Rs 1.1 crore on kitchen appliances. About Rs 1 crore was spent on curtains alone.

She asked one of the Prime Minister’s supporters ”Did he not say before the elections that if his party wins he will lead an austere life in a small house of 3 rooms? Where has all the money to construct and furnish this building come from?”.

The reply came ”He indeed wanted to live like a hermit in a 3 room apartment after he became the Prime Minister. But the people love him, and could not bear the sight of their beloved Fuhrer living so unostentatiously like an ascetic. Since he is a grand man, they wanted him to live grandly, like a Roman Emperor. So they voluntarily donated all the money used to construct the building and furnish it ”.

”But how can he run the country from jail?” enquired Alice, ”Why does he not resign until cleared of the charges against him?”

“Did Indira Gandhi resign when found guilty of election malpractices by the Allahabad High Court?” the Prime Minister’s supporter responded.

”She knew that once she resigned she would never be able to come back to power again. So our great leader will remain the dejure Prime Minister, while his wife will be the defacto one. This is of course the reverse of what Lalu Yadav did when convicted. He became the defacto Chief Minister of Bihar, and made his wife the dejure one”.

”But why is he so keen to hang on to power? He is behaving like Hitler who hung on to power till the bitter end”.

At this remark the members and supporters of the Doodh ka dhula party got livid, inflamed and infuriated , and picking up hatchets, hockey sticks and dandas started chasing Alice, who fled for her dear life.

She ran and ran, until with a jerk she woke up, and realised she had been dreaming. punjab

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ਉੱਲੂ ਨੇਤਾ ਅਤੇ ਭੇਡਮਈ ਵੋਟ

 

Picture of Markandey Katju

Markandey Katju

Justice Markandey Katju is former Judge, Supreme Court of India and former Chairman, Press Council of India.

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